


Rain

by leopup6ta



Category: Red vs. Blue
Genre: Depression, Heavy Angst, Hurt No Comfort, Implied/Referenced Suicide, M/M, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide Attempt, death itself, life after death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-23
Updated: 2019-03-23
Packaged: 2019-11-28 04:21:50
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,990
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18203453
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/leopup6ta/pseuds/leopup6ta
Summary: He just feels too tired to deal with all of it





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> An angst filled oneshot.  
> TRIGGER WARNING: Depression and Suicide

Springs squeaking and blankets ruffling, David stayed staring at the wall as his lover got up to get ready for work. He couldn't sleep. Hadn't slept. No sleeping pills within reach; he had to go to work in three hours anyway so why bother to sleep. A soft smile grazed his freckled face when Lavernius kissed him on the cheek before leaving. He didn't say anything back, just tried to get some shut eye even if it was just thirty minutes. He opened his eyes not ten minutes later and sighs. It just wasn't happening. 

He sits up and runs a hand through his greasy hair and grimaces. How was Tucker not disgusted? He supposes it was time for a shower; he couldn't go to work smelling terrible anyway. He grabs a clean set of clothes and heads to the shower, routinely washing his mouth and stepping into the cold spray of the shower. He stayed there, staring at the rocky, colorful floor of their shower, cold water plastering his blond hair to his face. With a heavy sigh, he grabs the unscented shampoo he buys for himself.

As he lathers his hair as slowly and relaxing as possible, he spots the razor hanging on the shower wall. He could end it right now; it wouldn't be hard to slice his wrists.

*

Red droplets fall onto the floor and David curses. His boss was going to kill him for ruining the priceless floors. He grabs a spare towel from his desk and dabs at it; it was always handy to have a spare of everything. Except shirts. He forgot about that. As he's trying to get most of the stain out of his work shirt, his boss passes by: Dr. Church. His boss just shakes his head and leaves. David sighs in relief, but turns to glare at York when he hears him snickering. "Shut up," he grumbles and finishes his lunch quickly. 

*

As soon as he pulled up intot he driveway, he smiles when Tucker's car was already there. It's been ages since his husband was home early from work. He steps into his house to find someone else there. It was a long time friend of theirs: Caboose. David wonders what he was doing there, but didn't question it. He must have carpooled with Tucker and decided to stay the night since Church was yet again away on another business trip. He sits down to talk with Caboose, laughing, smiling,  ~~lonely~~ and happy to see him. Tucker came out from the kitchen with a tray of snack for all three of them and David's cats decided to join them. 

David soon had to part ways with them and headed to the bedroom. He was tired, eyes feeling heavy,  ~~just a bother~~ and overall exhausted. Tomorrow would be the same: wake up, get ready for work, work, come back to an empty house, make dinner for both he and Tucker, and then sleep. At least he bought pills before heading straight home. 

As he starts getting ready to sleep, he hears both men outside bidding each other a good night's rest until Tucker stepped into their room. 

"You okay?" Tucker asks softly. 

"I'm fine. Just tired. Couldn't sleep last night and I had run out of sleeping pills," David mumbles. 

"You should've woken me up t-" 

"I said I'm fine. I already bought the pills today so...I'll sleep fine today" He smiles at him and takes his pills, downing them with water. He slips into bed and faces the wall. He feels the bed dip behind him and arms wrapping around him in a comforting embrace. 

But it wasn't enough. 

*

_'You have disappointed me for the last time.'_

 

He runs a hand through his hair. 

 

_'Why aren't you a fucking man!? Man up! Stop crying!'_

 

His body shakes as he sobs quietly. 

 

_'I only wanted three children and out you pop.'_

 

He takes in a deep breath and forces himself to hold back the tears. 

 

_'If I wanted a girl, we would've had one! Get out of my house you faggot!'_

 

David opens his eyes and stares at the showertiles. "You're not there anymore. You're not there anymore. You're with Lavernius Tucker. A great man." He smiles and stops the water. 

*

The week flies and David was once more lounging around the house with nothing but cleaning to do. He was slow; he didn't have the energy to do it and although Tucker has told him countless times he didn't have to do any house chores if he didn't feel like it, David hated a dirty house. He spent the day cleaning and preparing dinner, he forgot to shower once more. 

He could shower tomorrow. 

Sunday was the same. He did the laundry this time and cleaned the studios. He read through the calender and stared blankly at the red circle. Exactly a week from today. His parents were coming over for dinner. They've long since abandoned such close minded thinking, but he still hasn't forgiven them. Though, it wasn't right to keep them shut away; they did keep him sheltered for a good amount of years. 

He made dinner as usual and when both he and his husband were full, they went to sleep. He forgot to shower again.

He'll shower in the morning before work. 

*

David didn't show up for work. He was too tired to deal with his boss's temper. 

He didn't show up the next day. 

Or the day after that. 

He didn't show up the whole week. 

He ignored calls and texts from his coworkers and boss. He didn't want to deal with anything right now. He just wanted to catch up on sleep. 

He hadn't showered or shaved all week either. 

*

Sunday came and David took extra care of his house. He showered twice and shaved twice. He cleaned the bathroom amd cleaned the oven. He made sure evrything was spick and span for his parents. Tucker came in through the door with a smile, sitting him down to talk. David's parents came not an hour later and he greeted them with open arms. 

They all laughed, recounting hilarious times, the day he first met Tucker, when they saw Junior off to college,  ~~when David tried to kill himself~~ and all the great accomplisments he had within his job. 

Soon, Tucker was seeing his parents out while David stayed on the couch, his eyes glued to the table. He stood up when the door closed and headed staright for the kitchen. "I'm going to clean the kitchen. You can go to sleep," He says. 

"You sure?" Tucker asks with concern. 

"Yes. I'm fine." It was a robotic response. Tucker saw right through him and brought him into a tight embrace. 

He cried. 

*

David sets down his coat onto the chair, but freezes when he sees his desk cleared of his knick knacks save for the box filled with them. 

"....What kind of prank is this?" He turns to look at York, but frowns even more when he was given a pitying glance. Someone behind him clears his throat. He turns aroubd to come face to face with Carolina. 

"Boss, what's going on-" 

"You're fired. You are absent from work for a week, which by the way you had an important project to complete by last Wednesday, and did not give a valid reason as to why." She scolds him, though, there was pity in her eyes that told him she was just doing as she was told. He knew that if it were up to her, he wouldn've been given another chance. Multiple actually. 

"But I did!" He didn't. 

"If you did, we didn't receive. Goodbye, Washington." She guves him a quick hug then leaves. 

David stand there, rooted to his spot the grabs his coat, drapes it over his box and leaves. He ignores the glances his coworkers give him and couldn't be much more relieved as to how quick the elevator doors closed. 

Of course, it was just his luck when he steps out into pouring rain. He runs to his car, only realizing he's forgotten the keys inside them. 

"Fuck it all to hell!" He throws down the box, not caring when the items get strew out. He didn't care when heard his only framed photo break. He only cared about getting away from everything. 

 *

That day was just like this. Pouring. Clothes drenched. The high strung tension in the air between him and Felix. Nobody else was on the bridge besides them. No car on the streets.

Then they started fighting. It was a stupid reason really, but they were teens. One month away from graduation. Teens fight over anything, right?

And he remembered what happened vividly. 

He was there. 

Felix didn't commit suicide. 

He killed him. 

He pushed him. Felix slipped and the railing broke away from his weight. 

Felix fell onto an oncoming trailer. 

Dead upon impact. His body was torn. Mangled. Vomit-inducing. Blood everywhere. 

And his eyes. 

His eyes staring blankly up into the air.

And what did David do? 

**_He ran._ **

Everyone at school cried: they all liked Felix. He was popular. But the worst was Locus. Locus never cried. 

But now he did and he was outright crying. Sobbing. He was suffering. Locus lost his boyfriend, his best friend and it was all David's fault.

It should have been him who fell off the bridge. There was nothing to go back to anyway. 

Today is just like that night. Pouring. Clothes drenched. 

A mangled and torn blonde haired man staring blankly up at the sky. 


	2. A Small Chance

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No longer a oneshot.

_"There is a saying that your life flashes before your eyes the second before you die."_

A large black mass and glowing orb floating next to it watch what seems to be a movie. A scene in which a blonde young man was falling in front of a trailer.

"Is it true?" A small dull light asks.

"Why don't you tell me, David Washington." The large black mass turns its head towards the small yellow light. "Did your life flash before your eyes?"

"...No."

"Then it wasn't your time to die." The mass moves away from the glowing orb leaving it to ponder. The orb was watching the cloudy screen with intense curiosity, but grimaced the moment the trailer hit the body. It felt as if it had died twice. As if it had seen it happen before...and then then it hit.

"Is...is that me?" It asks hesitantly.

"Yes. Do you not like it?" The orb recoils. Why would it like it? It watched itself get splattered across a road. "I would assume so as it was your decision to die."

"...I didn't want to die."

"Liar. You threw yourself off of that bridge, knowing exactly what was going to happen-"

"I didn't want to die!"  
"Regardless of the how your friends will feel-"

"Please!"

"Regardless of what Lavernius Tucker would feel-"

" **I wanted the pain to end!** " The orb-no, David- yells. The dark mass brings up a bony hand to stop him.

"And did it end?"

"...No...I...I..." Slowly, David, the little ball of light, starts to lower onto the wispy floor.

"You...you said it wasn't my time to die. What did you mean? Was it...Felix's time to die as well?" His light started fading, but it was still there.

"If you had tried, if you bothered to try, both you and your friend Felix would have been walking across that stage." He swipes his hand in the air and the cloudy screen changes to another rainy night.

A younger David and Felix facing each other on the bridge.

"Tell me...do you wish to go back to change this?"

"I...Yes. Felix is my best friend...but I failed him." His light dimmed further.

"I am who you humans call Death. I am merely a messenger, however, and as the messenger I am to let you make a decision: Go back to this point in your life to right a wrong or...continue on through the dark forest and start a new life. A life where I can assure you have a wonderful family growing up." The orb turned around to gaze into the forest behind them. It was tempting. He always wished for a better childhood.

_"So, my dear child. What will it be?"_

* * *

David sits up abruptly, gasping for air. He clawed at his throat, at his stomach at his arms, lifting his hand to see the blood he had felt, but...nothing. There was nothing. No blood, no bones broken out of his skin. Just clothes. And a blanket and....oh no. He looks around expecting to see the old, bare, white walls of his parent's home, but this one was full of life. Plastered with posters, figurines, movies, clothes scattered everywhere and the blanket itself was a print of Master Chief. Wher-

"Finally up, Dave?" David looks up to see the smirk on his best friend, Felix. 

"Better than my parents's home. Thanks for taking me in." He smiles at him. Was it just a dream? No...the pain of being run over felt too real. 

"No problem. I always thought your parents were shit anyway. How ya feeling? Hungry?" 

"Feel like a trailer ran me over," he chuckles and grips the blanket. "I'm sore all over. Is it the food your mom made or that dreadful chicken salad you make." He makes a face to tease Felix and pouts when he's smacked over the head. 

"Chicken salad is delicious, but fortunately, for you, mom made lasgna." He says with a huff. 

"Thank fuck." He grins and gets out of the bed. "I'll...have to find a motel to sleep now." 

"Fuck that. You're sleeping here from now on. Mom said so." He smiles at him and leaves the room. David smiles and follows after him. He forgets how Korean Felix's household is when he steps out of the room. It was such a drastic difference from the heavily decorated room and the cultured decorated house. 

The evening was filled with genuine laughter and the excitement for prom the very next day. Both David and Felix slept in the same bed. 

It wasn't long before Day started and both teens were running around getting thwir outfits together. David had stashed his tux at Felix's as he knew his parents would have sold it by now. 

It was chaotic, but by the time five p.m. rolled around, they were ready for their dates. Felix and Locus were obviously going together and David was going with South as friends. 

Prom went well. Felix and David said their goodbyes to their dates and went outside to wait for Felix's mom. 

They went to the bridge to wait as it was close by and sat on the ledge. The cars rode by under them one by one; it was quiet and the moon was out. They talked for a while before it started to rain. 

"Crap. I don't have an umbrella," David grumbles, "let's go wait by the stores." 

"But mom already said she'd be here any minute. Besides a little rain won't kill us." Of course, as soon Felix said it, the rain grew heavier. "Come on, Felix." 

"David, it's fine. We don't need to go all they wave back down the stairs when mom is close by." 

"Felix! I don't want to get sick." 

"You won't! We'll keep each other warm." He huddles up against his friend, but David wasn't in the mood for any playfulness. He shoved him backwards, and snorted when he slipped and fell onto the railing. Felix glared at him but then widened his eyes when he felt the railing give way. David also watched with wide eyes, but they both gave out a nervous laugh when the railing surprisingly stopped giving way. 

It fell and David didn't think twice when he lunged forward to grab Felix by his foot. It was slippery and he was sliding forward as well with the weight of Felix. He grabbed hold of the railing and whimpered when he felt his fingers slipping. He heard Felix shout beneath him. 

"Trailer! Trailer! Fuck dammit, pull us up David!" He yelled out and struggled under him.

"Stop moving, We're both slipping!" 

"I don't want to die!" 

"We're not gonna die, okay!? How far is it!?" He asked and panicked a but when another finger slipped. 

"It's...it's getting close to the bridge!" 

"Okay...this is gonna sound crazy, but I'm gonna let go when it's under the bridge!" 

"What!? You're fucking crazy! We'll die!" 

"That's why I said it'll sound crazy! But we won't die!" They heard the honking of the trailer and Felix started crying. "Is it under the bridge!?" 

"Yes!" 

David held his breath and let go. 

*

He opens his eyes hesitantly expecting to see the black mass again-why was he thinking that?- but sees only the still night sky. "I'm...we're alive?" 

"Y-yeah. We're alive. H-how did you know we were gonna s-survive that?" 

"....I didn't." He says sheepishly. He looks at Felix with a grin. 

Before Felix could respond, the hear someone coming toward sthem on the trailer rooftop. "You kids okay!? If I hadn't seen you..." The man wrings his hat with an extremely worried expression. 

"We're alright, sir! Thank you so much!" They both get up and hug the man. Police cars were there and helped them down. EMTs checked them over and gave them the green. Felix's mom hugged them both tightly. They relayed what had happened to the officers and everyone agreed it was time to renovate the bridge. 

When they got home and everyone calm and collected, David lay in the bed as Felix showered. 

"Thank you.." he whispered into the air, though to who exactly, he didn't know. 

The dark mass in the corner simply smiled and spoke. 

_"You're welcome."_


End file.
